April 6 is my deathday.

I felt extreme sadness and I dont know why. What is on April 5? It seems to be an ordinary day. With list of to do activities, presumption of lates and disappointments. Yup, I am a bad student driver. Literally and probably figuratively. Worst, after 3 years, an unexpected enuresis recurrs. And the gloom persisted until I woke up.

4AM. Usually, this is the time I sleep. (I dont know why, but I'm kept awake until the wee hours of the morning.) But today, its my waking time.

Then I remembered. According to my dream exactly a year ago, today is my death day.

On what year, that I do not know.

But for sure, I don't think it is this year.

I just know.

I want someone whom I can call my own (and not someone else's).

Even I tell myself that this "kahibangan" is all over, i think its not. From time to time, in a bad way to start the day by openning my social account, i can feel pain. The enviness of not being in that place. The enviness and sadness why I dont have it. Am I not deserving? Or maybe God has something better for me?

I just think it that way. I'll have someone better.

I just hope sooner. But for now, I hate the feeling of bitterness.

Hello

We have nothing to say to each other
except the word hello.

(You greeted me with hello and I replied with hi.
Isn't it that the hi should come first before the hello?)